Feelin' Genki

Sunday, November 12, 2006

The Worst Parent Ever

I have days where I feel like the coolest Dad ever. And sometimes I have to question whether or not I'm warping my boy for life.

No, I'm not talking about wandering around without any pants on, something that both men in this house do rather often.

It's my strategy for removing chocolate bars as a source of temptation.

I accidentally left the box of leftover Halloween candy on the floor, where Milo had absolutely no trouble finding it.

So when I walked in on him playing in a small pile of chocolate bars, I didn't know how I was going to get out of this one without stealing candy from a baby and making him cry.

Well, cleanup went well, and everything was returned to its box, save for one small KitKat bar.

So I let him have it. He stuck it in his mouth, chewed on it, slurped a little, and generally crushed it with his few teeth while covering it with drool. No sugar high, no caffeine buzz, and he eventually lost interest.

See, I never took the wrapper off or even told him about the whole wrapper concept. Am I evil? Or just creative.

Feel free to take pointers from me, and give your children all the junk food you want -- as long as it's hermetically sealed.

Oh, and I ate the pulverized mess of chocolate myself. I especially enjoyed the pieces with discernible bite marks.

P.S. I KNOW I'm not the only one who does this. My friends Dave and Donna have long told their children about the "music truck" that drives around playgrounds in the summer time. The fact that it sells ice cream hasn't been mentioned.


Blogger Jan & Cindy said...

It will all be fine until the fateful day at school when the wrong kid gives him treat. He'll take it to be polite (since he never developed a taste for such things) and then munch it down whole. If the ridicule ever subsides his shame will turn to anger as he realises he's been duped by those he trusted most. Of course, he'll also have a good head of teeth and no ADD.

10:36 PM


Post a Comment

<< Home